Drive

Sometimes I feel like just sitting in a car and driving far away. I don’t even know where to go or where I will land up…I just wanna drive far, far away. I know of the places where I think I should be, places where I wish I was, places where I think I will find more happiness and better people than here…But where I am right now is none of them so I just wanna escape.

To be really honest I don’t really know where I belong. And don’t get me wrong, I ain’t running away like a coward, or maybe I am and I just don’t know it yet. Maybe the place where I think I should be might just turn out to be like the one I am in now. Maybe there isn’t actually a place where I belong. I don’t know. Sometimes I feel that I have more doubts and questions in my head than reasons and answers.

I wouldn’t be wrong if I said I have good friends here with me right now. But no one truly understands me than one or two of them…maybe I don’t give anyone a chance. Maybe they don’t deserve it. I don’t fucking know about anything or anyone in my life. People are way too complicated for me to understand. But I do understand them…I just wish I couldn’t. Why am I even writing this down? Its not like anyone will read this anyway.

You wanna read the happy stuff, the good stuff, the positive stuff, about waterfalls, rainbows and butterflies…you don’t wanna read about the ugly side of things and find beauty in it,you don’t wanna see the miserable Aazar, the weak Aazar, the Aazar who fell down so hard even thought he wasn’t so high. ‘Why don’t you try to be more positive man, man?’ that’s all they say. Without knowing what I went through or I am going through.

The more you see…the less you know…more you find out as you go…Bono was right, so right. Sometimes I feel I analyze life too much…I forget about trying to live it.

I just wanna drive away man…far, far away…and it will help if I had anyone with me because sometimes you can’t make it alone.

No distance is too far.

No road too long for a walking man. I’ve always believed that.

I don’t know where I will be tomorrow…

…But I know I will get there.