Morning. Weird bad dreams about losing Mishmi and finding myself in a totally new way but not like I want to. Woke up with the 'Tuesday blues'. I actually thought its Wednesday today. I thought again for a moment that I'm turning into my father so i should listen to my mother more often but i don't really want to because i don't sometimes like what she says or thinks but anyway, thats everyday so lets just forget about it. I thought I suck at guitar and should learn to play like Omar but I somehow just can't bring myself to do that...really wish I could write a song that I would be able to sing when I am alone with myself...really wish I'd friends who I could make up an entire band with but fuck it. Euphoria. Hell. Hell. Hell. I am bored. want something new to do. Anything. Actually, something else. Change of pace. Different plans. New plans. No 'plans'.
The only thing that's making me go on for this week is the thought of where I'll be next week at the same time. The only thing I am totally sure about right now is where I want to be. I don't think I've longed for Monday so much before.